THE FATHER'S HEART THROUGH A MOTHER'S EYES: EXPERIENCING GOD'S LOVE FOR ME THROUGH MY OWN EXPERIENCE OF LOVING MY CHILDREN...
I.
I.
“Blessed be the name of the LORD from this time forth
and forever. From the rising of the sun to its setting, the name
of the LORD is to be praised…”-Psalm 113:2-3
So, last week (or the week before), we said we'd look at HOW this verse might lead us into the practical nature of balance in our lives, hearts and homes. I'd like to suggest that the phrase: From the rising of the sun to its setting, The name of the Lord is to be praised" encapsulates God's highest priorities for us, which we must obviously claim for ourselves as we make our 'lists'.
After all, if I'm going to prioritize my 4-page list, I need to know that MY priorities are in fact in sinc with His. OK, So now WHY? and HOW does this help me find my balance???? That huge, 4 page "to do" list has not been wiped away. It's still there, and multiplying...but as a backdrop to a few things standing OUT. My TRUE goals, what matters MOST is beginning to crystalize.
So, last week (or the week before), we said we'd look at HOW this verse might lead us into the practical nature of balance in our lives, hearts and homes. I'd like to suggest that the phrase: From the rising of the sun to its setting, The name of the Lord is to be praised" encapsulates God's highest priorities for us, which we must obviously claim for ourselves as we make our 'lists'.
After all, if I'm going to prioritize my 4-page list, I need to know that MY priorities are in fact in sinc with His. OK, So now WHY? and HOW does this help me find my balance???? That huge, 4 page "to do" list has not been wiped away. It's still there, and multiplying...but as a backdrop to a few things standing OUT. My TRUE goals, what matters MOST is beginning to crystalize.
My TRUE goals each day, I know. They are my 'global' goals. But it must be a daily list, too. Moved from the realm of 'global importance' down into the realm of 24 hour importance.
HOW to reach them- make them my DAILY goals, without getting caught up in all the other 'important' stuff, is the obstacle. But as my heart is filled by the Lord's Words, my goals, I know...and you do, too.
1. God : To SEE Jesus, Here and Now, to KNOW Him intimately, to remain connected to my vine...this places GOD in first position on my list. And if I have any hope of gaining and maintaining a sence of peace in my role as a child of god, a wife, a mother, a friend, a member of the body...I HAVE to accept a paramount recognition that without doing this- PRACTICALLY doing this, SEEING Jesus, I am spinning my wheels. Period.
Deuteronomy 6:5" You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might."
2. My Family: These are the people God Himself has given into my life, that I may be to them a steward of love, support,faith and growth (In Christ and all other ways). This is my HUSBAND, MY CHILDREN...... I love the following guiding steps...
Proverbs 22:6 "Train up a child in the way he should go,Even when he is old he will not depart from it."
Titus 2:5... "Be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored."
Psalm 111:10 "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom;A good understanding have all those who do His commandments;His praise endures forever. "
YES! They do need wisdom fed to them! Of course they do! But I cannot rely on making them memorize scripture and not FIND the Lord Jesus ALIVE STILL TODAY in their lives and mine while doing so. TIME with them will lead me into sharing my heart. Sharing my heart will lead me into shining a light on Jesus. THIS is a huge part of raising up my childrenin the way that is right, and in doing it such that they will not turn from it later, as well as beginning their lives, grounding them in wisdom. It's about my connection to them, TIME spent talking, praying....(The other day I wanted to pray for Aaron's open house and called to the boys to gather the older ones to pray with me.....but they were off running around and clearly had no intention of stopping to listen to my actual WORDS before yelling, "ok Mom!!!" and carrying on about their play. So, I turned to Desi, sitting blissfully with some snacks at the kitchen table and I asked my 2 year old if he wanted to pray with me. He said "Yeah!" And so, where two or more are gathered.....right? He repeated my every word...and Aaron had double the open house 'traffic' that day!) Why can't I pray with my 2 year old about MORE than finding his toy??? Or healing his owie????? Or just because it's mealtime???? Why can't I show him that Jesus is real to Mommy and Daddy in our every dailiness? It's unfortunate, but a revelation to me non-the-less.
3. Friends and loved ones / the Body of Christ :
Romans 12:10Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor."
Mark 9:35"Sitting down, He called the twelve and said to them, " If anyone wants to be first, he shall be last of all and servant of all."
4. My individual calling and purpose as He leads me:
1 Corinthians 12:18 "But now God has placed the members, each one of them, in the body, just as He desired."
Ephesians 2:10 "For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them."
One thing to keep in mind for this one in particular, as I think we mentioned last week, is that all the things on our 'list' DO hold value, and ARE important and worthy of our time and energy- (usually "), but not ALL of them are paramount RIGHT NOW.
So, my goal here is to pare down to that which I KNOW the Spirit is calling me right NOW. It doesn’t mean erasing everything off my ‘to do list’ forever, but for a time, my body and mind and strength need to be both directed toward AND restful within the boundaries of what He Himself has ordained for me. My body can only do so much. My mind can only contain so much. My heart can only hold so many ‘goals’ before I am distracted from the purity of loving my Jesus, and the fruit of that love: the perfect refining element which leads me immediately to ‘what matters most’: My God, My family... My children.... I have them for only 18years if I’m lucky. The dishes will still be there in 18 years, and likely look the same. The laundry will still need washing, the chores still need done. But my babies will be grown, hopefully. And the atmosphere for learning to Love their Lord and savior, will in large part, be beyond any of my control or even daily influence.
NOW is the time for my praise to the LORD in their hearing, in their home, in their capacity to comprehend what loving Jesus means to ME. Am I telling them how I love Him, personally? What He's done/is doing in my life? Shared scripture that will inevitably back it up? Let Him be unveiled before them IN MY OWN LIFE????
From the rising of the sun to it’s setting, am I showing them to praise the name of the Lord? Am I praying with them in the morning? Providing an atmosphere of worship from the get go? After all, the other things will still be here in 18 years if they indeed are meant for my ‘doing’. Ephesians 2:10 reminds me that good works are prepared ahead for me to walk into…..and not only today, but my whole life long. If they are truly of the lord, they will not die within me because I didn't scratch them off the list today, but they will continue to call me closer in small increments until the time is right, and they will not be forgotten, after all….
He has made his works to be remembered.... Remember?
From the rising of the sun to it’s setting, am I showing them to praise the name of the Lord? Am I praying with them in the morning? Providing an atmosphere of worship from the get go? After all, the other things will still be here in 18 years if they indeed are meant for my ‘doing’. Ephesians 2:10 reminds me that good works are prepared ahead for me to walk into…..and not only today, but my whole life long. If they are truly of the lord, they will not die within me because I didn't scratch them off the list today, but they will continue to call me closer in small increments until the time is right, and they will not be forgotten, after all….
He has made his works to be remembered.... Remember?
And finally, 5. Taking Care of Myself.....the Me God created with love and affection and great intentionality. Stewarding my body and my mind, loving my neighbor as mySELF.....we all know these ones, but it's an easy one to let go, yes? Feels selfish? Don't forget that God made YOU in secret, knit you skillfully in the womb......Ps 119. You are His workmanship.....and responsible too, for stewarding that creation back unto His glory...
So in the midst of my clutter, most things tend to fall away as I read my "To Do" list and align its components into my new LIST of 5 GOALS. And breathe.
I remember that THIS time, THIS here and now- the one during which I too often recklessly fix my eyes on the end of the day instead of grasping the potential framed within it, THIS moment is not just mine. It is my children’s, my husband’s, my beloved friends’….and HERE is UNQUESTIONABLY where the Lord has rooted me. It is an inarguable fact. Here I am. And so, here I am meant to be.
I can enhance it, yes, with hobbies, passions, good pursuits. But I cannot allow them to take priority on my “list”. SITTING down with my God, my husband and children should be paramount, and when a 3 year old, with astonishment asks me why I am sitting, the Lord, I believe has chosen a tender mouthed, baby voiced messenger to use in His attempt to get my attention. It’s ok. To stop. To sit down. To breathe. To nap (if you get the chance!), To do NOTHING, as long as you are doing NOTHING with the right people. With Jesus, do nothing. Soak in him. With my family. Do NOTHING. Absorb and give in insides to them. With loved ones… Serving the body in MY capacity of giftings.....stewarding well the body and health (physical and mental) of the life God has given to me.....these 5 items, in their most relevent and present tense forms should answer my daily question, "What would you have me focus on today? And what can slip to the bottom of the list?" And if my mind is stayed here, upon asking this of Him, I do believe I'll find the REST of mind to let the rest sift to the bottom.......Do you?
I can enhance it, yes, with hobbies, passions, good pursuits. But I cannot allow them to take priority on my “list”. SITTING down with my God, my husband and children should be paramount, and when a 3 year old, with astonishment asks me why I am sitting, the Lord, I believe has chosen a tender mouthed, baby voiced messenger to use in His attempt to get my attention. It’s ok. To stop. To sit down. To breathe. To nap (if you get the chance!), To do NOTHING, as long as you are doing NOTHING with the right people. With Jesus, do nothing. Soak in him. With my family. Do NOTHING. Absorb and give in insides to them. With loved ones… Serving the body in MY capacity of giftings.....stewarding well the body and health (physical and mental) of the life God has given to me.....these 5 items, in their most relevent and present tense forms should answer my daily question, "What would you have me focus on today? And what can slip to the bottom of the list?" And if my mind is stayed here, upon asking this of Him, I do believe I'll find the REST of mind to let the rest sift to the bottom.......Do you?
III.
There will be different phases of life and in each one, the Lord will bring life back into old goals that were shelved (perhaps right now) and reveal their 'time' has come. Our husbands and children, even our own passions and pursuits will require our time and attentions, and God will equip us to those tasks in the new forms they've taken. No doubt, our babies will need us in different ways as they grow, but need us still. Our husbands the same, as they endeavor to continue in their own pathways. Even our own passions, if they are truly of His creation in us, will blossom naturally when the time is right. Being WILLING to set them aside, if only in part for now- for sake of what matters most HERE and NOW is the challenge.
That said: May I close up where we left off? With my 3 year old asking me WHY I sat down?
By now I've wrestled through yet another 2 family movie nights, but more successfully. Gratefully, I can say it was not with the exact degree of difficulty IN disciplining myself it SIT DOWN. Aaron did have to cast the knowing glance my direction: Hon, what aaaarrrrreeee you dooooooing? Abandoning me over here?? You could dooooo stuff in the kitchen for another hhhhooooouuuurrrr... And, it's true. I could. Wipe counters, pack lunches, gather library books to tuck into backpacks...oh, find sweatshirts...did I wash those??? Wait, I'm leaving the kitchen now and didn't even turn the dishwasher to ON... But I did do better.
I've absolutely NOT perfected this, but I'm calling myself a success right now in light of the remembrance of myself 2 weeks ago. I was in a wad. Everything I could think about was related to how cluttered the house was, all the things I needed to sort and get rid of, how if we owned HALF the stuff we did, I wouldn't have to clean HALF as much....but who was I kidding? I'd have busied myself somehow.....This overwhelmed state, this busy-ness, it's a mindset.
NOT an actual exterior state of chaos, but an interior one.
So let's not get down on ourselves. This is a life-long challenge. Let's encourage one another to chalk up every single success in this area instead of lumping them together into a mindset of how poorly we may or may not be doing at balancing all the balls we've got in the air. Let's accept God's grace, After all, each day has enough troubles of its own, right?
Now, is this to say that I am sinful for trying to do all that is on my plate? I am sinful for aiming high and falling short? I am sinful for even a magnificent 4 page list of good intentions???? HOW is it sinful of me to try hard and harder each day to accomplish what I feel I've been handed???
Let me clarify. I don't believe we are sinful for our good intentions. I believe we MISS THE MARK by getting swallowed by those good intentions at the cost of 'What Matters Most'. GOD'S PRIORITY LIST. For our lives. For our days... Is He angry? Is He disappointed? I don't think so.....He Himself formed us in the womb....He is mindful of our frame, He knows that we are but dust.... Do these testaments to His compassion and understanding assure you that His is not angry or disappointed? Rather, that He is compassionate when we get ourselves overwhelmed and WANTS better for us. MORE for us, in the simplicity of HIS priorities.
Consider this: He sees us getting ourselves buried and He even offers us a way OUT once we've backed ourselves into a corner!!!
"For thus the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel, has said,'In repentance and rest you will be saved,In quietness and trust is your strength.' Isaiah 30:15
So- Am I to repent for all my good intentions? Things which, after all, seem Godly or at least important for the most part? And to REST? HOW am I supposed to do that? Do I no longer have to stay up on my chores? My house work? No, I must fit this in too. I am not off the hook completely by my ‘rest’ verse. But here's a thought:
WHAT IF I could REST in my MIND as I went about my tasks and played out my cherished, though exhausting, roles of the day. Everyday. What if I could do that? Is that possible? If so, would it not come naturally to pare down my list to the highest of callings set upon it? Would it not be obvious to me, without all the mind clutter, to worship my God first? To serve my husband and children second? To reach out and serve my loved ones, friends, the body? To care for myself as God intended? Would this not REQUIRE being written down, but blossom from a heart full of peace and a mind somehow- set at rest?
May I suggest we MEMORIZE Isaiah 26:3
"For You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is stayed fast upon you."
"For You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is stayed fast upon you."
If I can keep my mind stayed upon Him, He says I’ll find perfect peace. It’s one of the verses I struggle to believe, but I never will until I try it out yes? I tried it out this week.....
Overwhelmed at one among many points….I sat in my closet praying, didn’t hear Gaby follow me and come in and sit in front of me. Finally he began stroking my leg and when I looked up, deep concern braced his furrowed little brown. “Why you sad, mama?” “I was talk to Jesus, honey. Sometimes, when I feel a little sad or have too much to do and don’t feel happy in my heart, I try to talk to Jesus so He can help me.”
“Oh,” he said thoughtfully. “But I didn’t hear you. Your mouf is not moving……?”
“Oh, well,” I said, “ I was talking to him in my heart, and not using my voice.”
It was good enough for him. He put both hands to the sides of my cheeks, puckered up and kissed me square on the lips. “You not sad anymore?”
“No baby, I’m not sad anymore,” I said. And to tell you the truth, I wasn’t. I left my closet peaceful, back into the SAME household full of the same needs….but I was at ease somehow- AND the BONUS??? I actually unveiled the truth of God’s Word and Spirit to my child as a natural result of it! I didn’t have to write it, OR TRY to cross it off my list!
Overwhelmed at one among many points….I sat in my closet praying, didn’t hear Gaby follow me and come in and sit in front of me. Finally he began stroking my leg and when I looked up, deep concern braced his furrowed little brown. “Why you sad, mama?” “I was talk to Jesus, honey. Sometimes, when I feel a little sad or have too much to do and don’t feel happy in my heart, I try to talk to Jesus so He can help me.”
“Oh,” he said thoughtfully. “But I didn’t hear you. Your mouf is not moving……?”
“Oh, well,” I said, “ I was talking to him in my heart, and not using my voice.”
It was good enough for him. He put both hands to the sides of my cheeks, puckered up and kissed me square on the lips. “You not sad anymore?”
“No baby, I’m not sad anymore,” I said. And to tell you the truth, I wasn’t. I left my closet peaceful, back into the SAME household full of the same needs….but I was at ease somehow- AND the BONUS??? I actually unveiled the truth of God’s Word and Spirit to my child as a natural result of it! I didn’t have to write it, OR TRY to cross it off my list!
To close: I just LOVE these quotes......maybe you'll find them redeeming too as you continue to cling to The Word in the quest for practical balance in your Mommy-ing.
“Three Rules of Work: Out of clutter find simplicity; From discord find harmony; In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.” Albert Einstein
“"Think simple" as my old master used to say - meaning reduce the whole of its parts into the simplest terms, getting back to first principles.” Frank Lloyd Wright
"The aspects of things that are most important for us are hidden because of their simplicity and familiarity." -Ludwig Wittgenstein
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